After first meeting online dating
I’ve seen countless women create complete fantasies and get drawn in — often before they even meet a man. With no tonality in messages, texting back and forth creates enormous opportunities to misread and misunderstand intent.
I can’t tell you how many emails I’ve received from coaching clients with a text conversation pasted in and the question: What do you think he means (aka WTF)????
But if you leave it a week he’ll give up and go on a date with someone else.” Erin: “I once got obsessed with a guy because he never phoned me.
At first I only fancied him a bit, but the more I waited for his calls, the more interested I got. ” Harry: “I think you have to be so careful with playing hard to get.
I think you should switch your phone off on the way home from a date and ignore it until at least the next afternoon. Don’t be too much in their face, it’s annoying.” Adam: “Up to a point, yes.
If a girl I’m dating doesn’t phone me, I’m desperate to know why, and it makes her more interesting.
Expecting him to move on to something more serious isn’t realistic. There are so many ways to know if a man is a serious guy who is interested in getting to know you. It’s a type of false connection that sets up incredibly unrealistic assumptions and expectations.
Over the past few years it seems that almost every dating dilemma I hear from my coaching clients and girlfriends has something to do with the texting. He told her how busy he was and she felt flattered that he was keeping in touch.
Texting and dating definitely isn’t just for 20 year olds anymore. “Melissa” stayed up until 3 AM texting with her dude. She wants to know how to stop obsessing over him being The One.
So…the bottom line on texting and dating is this: use texting sparingly, wisely and, most of all, don’t read too much into it.
Remember, real life and real love happen in person, smile to smile, touch to touch.